Do you believe you are the One?

Well, do you? Have you seen the movie the Matrix? Morpheus thinks Neo is the one; so much so he is willing to risk his life for him. How many in your community feel that strongly about you?

Hey, where did everybody go?

It is certainly something I ponder at times and wonder, how much is enough? Am I settling or should I be proud of my accomplishments? I know I can do more, but how much more and to what end? Do I want fame, fortune, more toys; or should I be content being comfortable in my own skin and not looking outward for validation?

How much is enough fire in your belly? What is the difference between mediocrity and contentment? Is it a bad thing to be content?

If you are happy with your existence and the effort you are putting forth, should that be good enough? Is your measuring stick how you compare to others, or can you internalize it and compare it to your expectations?

Have you had this conversation?

This is the exchange between the Oracle and Neo, would you walk away from this conversation thinking you were the one, the man? We all believe we have it in us, but how do we manifest it?

Oracle: You know why Morpheus brought you to see me?
Neo: I think so.
Oracle: So, what do you think? You think you’re the one?
Neo: I don’t know.
Oracle: You know what that means (pointing to a sign above the door)? It’s Latin. Means `Know thyself’. I’m going to let you in on a little secret. Being the one is just like being in love. No one can tell you you’re in love, you just know it. Through and through. Balls to bones. Well, I better have a look at you. Open your mouth, say Ahhh.
Neo: Ahhh.
Oracle: Okay. Now I’m supposed to say, `Umm, that’s interesting, but…’ then you say…
Neo: But what?
Oracle: But you already know what I’m going to tell you.
Neo: I’m not the one.
Oracle: Sorry kiddo. You got the gift, but it looks like you’re waiting for something.
Neo: What?
Oracle: Your next life maybe, who knows? That’s the way these things go.

Notice that the Oracle never tells Neo that he isn’t the One. Neo says it, and the Oracle merely lets Neo believe it.

Ultimately, he discovers he is the one but it took many trials and tribulations before he actually believed it.

What is your trial by fire? 

I sense many restless souls among us, churning and burning, waiting for that one big event that validates us and lets us know we have finally reached the pinnacle.

My concern is, we are not appreciating the journey and that event will always be elusive. Similar to people who seek out cosmetic surgery for that perfect look; knowing when they attain it, then their life will be perfect too.

Sadly to say, they will never find that perfection.

Let’s face it, we are all unique in our own way and that should be celebrated. However, we also not only have different talents and abilities, but different circumstances and motivations that drive us.

You see your peers lighting it upbut wonder how they got their hands on the  secret sauce and not you. They certainly don’t have anything you don’t have, so what is the difference? Probably just luck, right?

Or, do you already have the secret sauce and just don’t recognize it?

But it looks so easy

Tiger Woods, whether you like him or not, is the best golfer in the World. He might not be on the pedestal right now, but trust me, he is the one. 

Most think he is just naturally gifted and the game of golf comes easy to him.

He didn’t just show up good; he practiced like nobody’s business. And I can assure you, it was not just the hours he put in, he practiced smart too.

Certainly we all need to put in the time, but just working harder is not necessarily going to get it done.

How much time did you put in this week? 

Whatever your job is, whether you work for yourself or someone else; how much do you practice to become the best you can be in your job? Do you just show up to play, or do you actually work at being the best?

What are your trials and tribulations you face? What are you doing today to become the one?

How’s that for deep? That.is.all.

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35 thoughts on “Do you believe you are the One?

  1. I believe when we’re able to release the need for outside validation, we free ourselves to be the person we truly are. Sometimes it’s not easy, especially online, when we crave those comments and likes and nods our way. But when we write what we write, do what we do and say what we say because it simply must be written, done or said, without looking to measure up or receive acknowledgement, that’s freedom.

    I strive to be the best I can be, each and every day. Some days I falter, but most days I can say: I lead a blessed life. I do what I want, when I want, how I want to do it, while running a business and a household, holding close to family and friends and realizing…to be the best I can be means I can offer the best to all I connect with. Today, I’m heeding ever closer to my words. Cheers! Kaarina

    • I agree; outside validation probably hinders us more than anything. It becomes this elusive goal and you never know when you have arrived; you are always chasing.

      There certainly has been a lot of things I have or have not done in social because I’m ok doing it my way, even if it may never get me anywhere. If I don’t make a list or get a Friday mention, I’m pretty sure the sun will still come up, I will have a good day, and in the big scheme of things it really didn’t matter anyway.

      It’s all perspective and if we can look inward and only worry about the important stuff (and it’s really a very, very small list to worry about) then life is good and you can be happy in your own skin and know you are doing what you can.

      Good to see you; thanks for the chat yesterday.

  2. Never saw the Matrix Bill but can relate to the conversation here and your point of this post.

    My Mom hates Tiger but that’s just because of all the attention he use to get you know, cause he was the one. I know for a fact that he’s been practicing his entire life so he may have a gift of golf but he’s worked for it too. Something I think a lot of people take for granted.

    I’ve done my best to get to where I am today Bill. I definitely am not perfect just like today I’m dragging big time. But overall I am a worker and I strive to do the best I possibly can and I hope that I lead a good example for others.

    I am truly blessed Bill, truly blessed.

    ~Adrienne

    • And nobody is perfect; that is why it is not a good model to covet what others have. Be happy and thankful for what you have and life gets much simpler.

      Sometimes we are our own worst critics and don’t give ourselves enough credit for all the good things we have done and accomplished; we’re still standing, right? That should be worth something in and of itself.

      As long as we believe in ourselves, then that is all that really matters.

      Good to see you Adrienne.

  3. The only person I truly compete with is myself. That is because I always know when I have put in the time to do something right, just as I know when I have taken shortcuts.

    When I get restless it is usually because I feel like I can do more to push things along or because I can’t do anymore and I get impatient. Kind of a vicious cycle there sometimes. ;)

    But ultimately I see my fate as resting in my hands. I don’t have to be the best but I could be number four or maybe seven.

    • But by giving it your best then you can be satisfied knowing the effort was there.

      I have seen people get into my business and I think there is no way they can’t succeed. They are personable, know everybody and just seem to have the ‘it’ factor. But whatever reason there is one or two parts to their game that is enough of a weakness that ultimately makes is a deal breaker; they don’t make it.

      This is the same with anything you do however; there are so many moving parts and variables you have to find a way to align them all up so they are working for you and not against you. And yes, sometimes it takes just a little bit of ‘luck’ at times too.

      Also in my business, restless is good because it is usually your kick in the shorts; desperation is not, because it shows when you are trying to close the deal.

      Here’s to keep plugging away trying to get all those stars to align for us.

  4. Hard work is hard work.
    Entitlement is not akin to hard work.
    The only way to find out if you are the one is to do and be.
    If you want validation you are not the one.
    Vanity is a bitch.
    If you stop looking for it and just do it will come your way.

    Or go golfing……that’ll teach you if you are the one or not. Real damn fast. ;-)

    • Golfing says I don’t even have the gift; but I did on one or two holes and that’s what keeps me coming back. I do have two hole in ones, so I was the One for a brief period in time, huh?

      I like your statement: The only way to find out if you are the one is to do and be. I see people in social seeking validation and recognition from the ‘A’ list players and they think they haven’t arrived until that happens. That’s not healthy or sustainable and until they can figure out how to ‘do and be,’ they will go nowhere and always be unsatisfied.

      Vanity is a bitch; the sooner you can learn to be happy in your own skin the happier you will be.

      • Nailed it!

        Yes, one or two holes keep me coming back. BTW, the idea that “if you stop looking it will come” couldn’t be more relevant in my game (golf, that is). I have had 3 rounds this year under 90 and am averaging 5-7 pars per round now. I just let go and decided to just “play the game.” I think social is the same way as are so many other things in life.

        Yeah, I know it’s rote, table-stakes, obvious but it bears repeating specifically to those that “need” A-List attention to validate themselves. Let them go and live your life. That’s about all you can do.

  5. I’ll say this, Bill, if you’re looking from validation from outside — which we all do every now and then — make sure you validate yourself first.

    In other words, people approve of people who approve of themselves.

    My, but I am getting terribly repetitive these days. :/

    • Repetitive; didn’t I see this reply somewhere else?……..:).

      Validate yourself; be happy in your own skin; be confident of our abilities and people will ‘approve’ of you.

      Once I got past the honeymoon phase in social, the thing I noticed the most was how many people were just chasing. Chasing the ‘right’ crowd, chasing validation, chasing sanity. If that is what it took to be a ‘player’ in here, I was going to pass. That’s also about the time I focused more on doing my own thing and not get caught up in the silliness of everything else.

      I have made some good friends in here and that and a couple of bucks will get me a small coffee at Starbucks, huh? Should I tweet that?

      Good to see you.

  6. I never watched the Matrix but…the conversation between Neo and the Oracle was truly a platform for a philosophical discussion. When DO we actually “get” that we “are” the one. As the quote implies, we can only “know” that we are the one when we are ready to “know”. How profound! In our daily life we experience many times of doubt and uncertainty but, if we really “listen” to our inner voice, we can eventually “know” when we are in the zone. When I am at work, I am trying to hone the skill of waiting and listening before I make a decision….because, if I wait and listen, I am far more apt to know what is the right direction to go. I think this is far more complex than just listening to our egos speak. To really “hear” what “the Oracle” is sharing with us, we need to heed the words of our friends and loved ones, along with our intuition, and then make our “decision”. Understanding the “oneness” of ourselves is not a journey of egocentricity…it is a journey of listening.

    Okay….I’m done waxing philosophical. What is it about your posts that encourage me to go on and on….I hope that I don’t put you or readers asleep ;-)

    Glad, as always, to stop by, Bill….you are awesome…
    ;-)
    Claudia

    • Whoa, thanks for the props……

      The thing I liked about Neo was, he was somewhat naive and humble; because of this he had a hard time accepting the mantle as being the one. I would like to think I have those same traits; whereas I’m totally confident in my abilities, I’m certainly not going to be shouting from the rooftops ‘I am the One.’

      To continue waxing philosophical, I feel I do a very good job of looking within and what makes me happy and content. I am not out there chasing some dream, because I am living the dream. I don’t ‘want’ for a lot and I’m very happy w/ my lot in life. To me, that is worth a lot; it helps me sleep soundly at night.

      So good to see you, I hope you have been well.

  7. Sorry I missed last week’s post, my friend. I had huge chunks of writing due to my editor on Friday and I was underwater.

    Okay, you hit me with a pop culture reference right away here and I got a little distracted. While I watch lots of movies, I’ve never seen The Matrix. Always thought it was too heavy in the action-adventure mode for me. But I can see with some of the dialogue, it has more going for it than that. : )

    Several things got me thinking here. One was the journey as opposed to arriving. Yes, it’s all about the ride. The older I get, the more I realize it. We don’t stop enough and just savor it.

    And those ones with the secret sauce, the ones who seemed to have succeeded overnight? We weren’t there to see all the things they were doing to make things happen. I love the quote: “The harder I work, the luckier I get.”

    I am so not into competing with others at this point. If it IS anyone I compete with, it’s my perfectionist self. That’s been a tough one for me. Oh, and keep that philosophical stuff coming. Love it when you make me think.

    • There are certain parts of the movie I really like. The Oracle also told Trinity she would fall in love with ‘the One.’ And she was in love w/ Neo so she knew he had to be the One. However, Neo was so naive he didn’t know Trinity even loved him. And even when Neo kept doubting himself, Trinity never wavered because she was in love.

      I really try to do a better job of enjoying the journey; there is only one final destination and since I don’t know when that is, I want to enjoy myself as much as possible until I get there.

      A lot of the people who succeed and make it look easy; have actually spent a lot of time and effort to get where they are. It looks easy, because they were prepared.

      Instead of sitting around wringing your hands wondering why your neighbor has a beach house and you don’t; if that’s what you covet then do something about it. Just be careful what you covet however as it’s better to appreciate who and what you already have.

      I feel I am a competitive person; but I am happy to compete w/ myself and be more happy and proud of my efforts than what my ‘score’ might happen to be.

      Good luck with your writing and so good to see you; I hope your week goes well.

  8. If you believe you’re the one, nothing else really matters; because you are, and if you haven’t become yet, you will… If you simply believe.

    The problem is believing you’re something you’re not; because deep down, you don’t really believe you are. That’s what some would call a dreamer…

    Some things in Tigers life have shaken his belief in who and what he is – – simply a realization that he needs to become a better person and roll model that he would like people to believe he is.

    He’s the best golfer that has ever lived – but has struggled in recent times at the being the best human being that he can be.

    Golf is mental game; even the best can’t shake that reality.

    Cheers Bill!

    • You hit the nail on the head, believing you are something you aren’t. Some just talk louder or brag more to present the illusion they might be the one, but those are easily seen through. The scary ones are the ‘prophets’ who have a following built on trust and they take advantage of that.

      From a pure golf standpoint, Tiger is the greatest that ever lived and I will argue against any other name that is mentioned. However, because so much of the game is mental, Tiger has definitely lost his mojo and he might not ever recover.

      Here’s the part of the story that’s rarely mentioned. Because Tiger was SO focused on golf as a youth, he never developed good social skills; essentially he was socially awkward. Once he became famous and these hot chicks were suddenly throwing themselves at him, he really believed he was the man and wanted to make up for lost time. Unfortunately, he wasn’t mature or social savvy enough to harness those desires.

      As I mentioned above, Neo was naive and humble; that is why he had such a hard time believing he was the One. Kind of like you and me, but we’ll figure it out, right?

      Good to see you Mark.

    • No smelly fingers? No butt cracks?

      It was deep, huh? So many times we look outside for validation and that’s just an illusion at best. You really do have to internalize and believe in yourself.

      Here’s to you ‘thinking’ guy; good to see you.

      • OK. All the great comments here really got me thinking. So I went out last night and wrote, filmed and edited my thoughts. I mean, that is, I found this via Google Alerts:
        “Greatness is for all of us”

  9. Ah, here it is again.

    Funny thing: the moment we stop looking for approval or worry about what others might think, everything falls into place. At the risk of sounding cliched – comparison IS the thief of joy.

    I amble on happily through life, knowing I am the one to those that matter to me.

    That. is. all.

    Glad you posted this back. :D

    • I amble on too, and as long as I’m happy and content then life is good, right?

      Unfortunately, being in sales we are compared against each other given the premise we are all competitive and should seek the top spot. I’m competitive, but not necessarily in that way. I would rather see us all succeed instead of it necessarily being a ‘I win, you lose’ scenario. When I’m at the top I’m ok with the recognition, but knowing there is only one way to go from there, I take it for what it’s worth. Just like fame, it can be fleeting.

      Yes, I did figure out how to make it re-appear……….:).

      Good to see you; thanks for your thoughts.

  10. Hey Bill

    Everyone wants different things from life. Some want fame and fortune, others just want to get on with life, enjoy it and not think about it too much. Me, I’m somewhere in between.

    I worked so hard when I was employed that I lost sight of what is important in life. Life is for living. For me, it’s more about working to live, not living to work. Or at least in more recent times anyway. Maybe I’m just that bit older and don’t want to play any more!

    If I am ‘The One’ to those that matter, should I care about anyone else?

    Cheers

    Tim

    • Ah yes, older/maturity puts a different perspective on what is really important and what is not.

      Could I have done more? Absolutely…..Have I done enough? Absolutely. I have probably far exceeded what I thought I would achieve and I didn’t sacrifice any family time to get it done.

      If you are the One to those who matter then absolutely, that is all that matters.

      I look at each day as an adventure; somewhere, somehow I will seek out and find some fun.

      Good to see you sir; thanks so much for this visit.

  11. Bill that’s as good as post as you have ever written! You raised all the questions that are universally struggled with (at least by thinking people). I always come back to the premise that you have to figure out who you are and then have the courage to be that person. For me societal expectations aren’t in the mix. To be as happy as the human condition will allow you, you have to march to the beat of your own drum.
    Riley

    • Thank you sir, I appreciate your kind words.

      If you can figure out who you are, be comfortable in your own skin, and know you are putting forth enough effort to satisfy yourself, then yes, you can be the One.

      Wanting to ‘fit’ in and be popular has probably stifled many. You can certainly be out on an island if you want to dance to the beat of your own drum. Whereas I have been pretty conservative, I am all for diversity and being exposed to different ideas and methods.

      I’m just happy I get to play in the game and I’m having fun doing it.

      So good to see you Riley; thanks for the visit.

  12. Bill,

    You really went deep on this one. And it is too early in the morning to think about this. But I can say, once I let go I became happy.

    Let go of being angry.
    Let go of trying to control others or life.
    Let go of worry.
    Let go of past guilt.

    You get the picture.

    I am not saying I am a shell of a person now or I have no feelings for others. I just don’t worry as much as I use to. I do what makes me happy and then I can make others happy in the process.

    That.is.all.for.me.
    :-)

    ~Allie

    • Very prophetic and what a great analogy; letting go. I have never thought of it that way, but I do a great job of letting go; if it’s not important, and very few things really are, then let it go…..

      If you are happy and you know it, clap your hands……..:). I’m happy and I know and it definitely shapes my outlook and attitude.

      So good to see you; thanks for the visit and words of wisdom.

  13. Ah, I miss the matrix, I love that movie. And now I need to watch it again. Well, only the first one, I didn’t care that much for part 2 and 3.

    Like Jack, I compete only with myself, and in that sense I’m the one (because there are nobody else) :)

    By the way, you’re in my latest short story on Amazon ;-)

    • Yes, the first one is a classic; Trinity is ultra hot……….:).

      I have your book in my Kindle, I just need to read it……..especially now that I know I’m in it; hopefully not the serial killer……..yikes…..

      Looking w/in is always good; too much noise otherwise. Good to see you…..

  14. I am already the one! ;)

    No, really am not. I just try to better than what I was yesterday. Sometimes I might not be that great, sometimes I might be worse. But what really matters to me is that I tried.

    The only thing we can truly do to become the one is try and believe that you will become the one!

    P.S. How come so many people haven’t watched Matrix.. please go watch it…

    • No, really you are…..you just have to believe…..:).

      And being the One can take many forms; it doesn’t mean you are perfect and know-er of all things, but you can still be the One in many things you do.

      I really like the Matrix; the whole premise of the movie and how everybody believes in Neo except himself. And of course, Trinity in that rubber suit she wears is kinda hot…:)

      Here’s to being the One Hajra, I hope your day is going well.

  15. Hey Bill,

    I think I was sometimes the one, rather the only one ;). Whenever there was a crisis in my workplace or at client location, I was put to work. Sadly though it was appreciated but I got nothing much from it.
    I think stretching boundaries, breaking comfort zones and trying to outdo ourselves is really important. Neo was not a believer in things he could achieve and needed a push. Sometimes a little help and inspiration goes a long way.
    Hope you are doing great and have a great day :).

    • Didn’t you used to be somebody? Why yes, I think I was the One at one time….:).

      Being in sales, you can definitely be the One one day and then be ‘what have you done for me lately’ real quick. Therefore, I think being the One is an inward validation, not validation from others.

      Getting out of the comfort zone is a must; especially if you want to grow and see what’s out there.

      So good to see you sir, thanks so much for taking the time to stop by.

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